by Scott Batchelor, Contributing Writer
Matchbox. A poor man’s Hot Wheels. Maybe that’s unfair, but growing up, I don’t remember knowing a single kid who collected Matchbox. Hot Wheels? Kind of. Matchbox? Seriously, never. My wife literally thought they were the same thing. So, imagine my surprise when Matchbox: The Movie begins with a scene set in 1998 and expects me to believe that a group of middle schoolers had bonded over their love of these little cars. Honestly, this opening was so pointless I’m gonna yadda-yadda it and get straight to the meat.
Fast-forward 28 years, and Sean (John Cena) is now a secret agent weaponizing his car like he’s in a different furious fast car movie. Because when you are in “Filmworld,” your hobbies as a kid translate directly into who you become as an adult. After successfully delivering an off-the-books warhead, Sean reunites with his childhood friends: his childhood crush Aimee (Jessica Biel), an EMT and amateur racer; construction savant Crosby (Sam Richardson); science teacher Ted (Arturo Castro); and helicopter pilot Charmaine (Teyonah Parris), who will all bring their own individual skills to the team despite being civilians. Comedy ensues as the ragtag group of friends gets caught up in Sean’s world of espionage. It’s the classic fish-out-of-water story that succeeds in many spy movies, and the dynamic works here too. While the romance subplots feel forced, the friendship dynamic helps you care about our heroes.
Unfortunately, the writing doesn’t always do the cast any favors. I’ve seen all of these actors give better performances elsewhere, so I know the clunkiness has more to do with the writing. The comic relief is pretty solid; Sam Richardson and Arturo Castro are standouts with their one-liners and timing. But that is the biggest issue: the writing is wildly inconsistent. One minute I’m laughing at a genuinely funny exchange, and the next I’m wondering how that was the approved take. It’s frustrating because the movie clearly has the talent to be better.
That’s not to say this was a hard watch. My feelings toward this film are complicated. Where Matchbox: The Movie really shines is in its action. The stunts are ridiculous, but they’re well shot, and I could follow what was happening instead of trying to make sense of a dozen quick cuts. The fight and chase scenes are really well done. There is one scene that actually utilizes “Matchbox vehicles” that is a lot of fun. Super campy. But fun.
I think my biggest frustration with the script is that a few different storytelling decisions could have made this a much better movie. The opening scene meant to establish their friendship is such a bore. Ted tells a touching story later in the movie explaining how they met, and that sounds like a much better opening. They also squander the best chase scene by placing it before the finale rather than ending on a high. With an already bloated runtime, this probably could have been trimmed.
If there is one question that sums up this movie, it’s this: What did this have to do with Matchbox? The cars are kind of mentioned in the beginning, but for the most part, they are afterthoughts. This very much feels like an action movie that got a bit of a synergy touch-up. Overall, though? It’s fine. The cast has chemistry, the action is entertaining, and there are enough laughs to make it worth watching. It’s just frustrating knowing how easily this could have been something better. The fact that it won me over, at all, after twenty minutes of sludge proves this movie knew what it was doing, just not consistently.
Rating: Just Okay
Matchbox: The Movie is currently available to stream on Apple Tv
You can read more from Scott Batchelor, and follow him on Letterboxd and Twitter